Former Dolphins, Marlins and Panthers owner shows his true colors. (bleacherreport.com)

With today marking the opening of Spring Training camps across Arizona and Florida, the timing seemed right for a little baseball talk.

I’d like to talk about the hope that comes with a new season, not only for big spending teams like the Yankees and Mets, but for teams with payrolls hovering around CC Sabathia’s yearly take like the Marlins and Pirates.

I’d like to talk about the World Baseball Classic which will be played again this year and how Cuba will clearly be whooping on all comers.

I’d even like to talk about all the steroids nonsense going on from Bonds to the Rocket to more recent news about A-Rod and Tejada.

But all the pops into my head when thinking about baseball now is my hatred for one Mr. H. Wayne Huizenga.

For those of you who don’t know, Huizenga is basically a real rich guy who likes making more money.

Until a few weeks back, Mr. Huizenga was the majority owner of the Miami Dolphins. Before that he was also responsible for bringing both the Florida Marlins and Florida Panthers to South Florida.

While he actually cared about the Dolphins and was always willing to put money into the franchise, he treated the Marlins and Panthers like nothing but businesses.

In 1997, he managed to put together a Marlins team that was good enough to make the playoffs and then win the World Series in seven games against the Cleveland Indians.

And then, before the confetti had been sweeped up from the victory parade, he tore that team to shreds.

Gone were stars like Moises Alou, Edgar Renteria, Kevin Brown, Al Leiter and Robb Nen.

A few months into the next season the Marlins then said goodbye to Gary Sheffield, Bobby Bonilla and Charles Johnson.

What was the reason for this madness?

One word. Money.

Huizenga said the Marlins weren’t making him any money so he was going to sell the team.

Fair enough. There’s no reason he should have to keep losing money on something he didn’t really care about.

But if you’re going to sell something, why not sell it when it’s in top shape?

He had a world championship team full of young players, and decided to strip it down before making the sale.

The result was a 1998 Marlins team that went 54-108, a mark which is still a franchise-worst to this day.

Even worse for Marlins fans, this was the beginning of a trend that continues to this day.

The Marlins build up a team. It tastes success. It gets gutted and the process starts from scratch.

Now you may be asking why I’m bringing this up now since Huizenga hasn’t been in charge of the Marlins for 10 years now.

It’s simple. He brought it up.

On Tuesday, while talking with reporters, he brought up that 1997 Marlins championship team.

And he said he regretted what he did.

“If I had to do it all over again, I’d say, ‘OK, we’ll go one more year. I’m telling you right now, at the end of this year, I’m out of here,’” Huizenga said. “That’s what I would’ve done, but that’s in hindsight. There’s nothing you could do about it. The decision was made and we made it.”

Now, while this may seem like an innocent enough statement, I see it as a slap to the face of Marlins fans.

Marlins fans have been suffering since that move.

Yes the won the Series again in 2003, but there have also been two more firesales since then.

Everytime something good happens for the team, it is quickly followed by something negative.

And as far as I’m concerned, this all goes back to Huizenga.

While he may think the typical South Florida sports fan loves him for all the money and effort he put into the Dolphins, the sting of what he did to the Marlins has never gone away.

I mean, if someone steals your kidney while you sleep, are you gonna love them cause they gave you an ice cream cone later on?

No!!!

Hells No!!!

So while some might have considered it a sad day when Huizenga sold the Dolphins, I considered it to be a reason to celebrate.

The man who had burned South Florida sports fans more than any other was gone.

Coincidently, this week there is a good chance the Marlins will finally get the final approval to begin building their long-awaited new stadium.

If all goes well, then the team may finally be at the point where it’ll be able to keep its players past puberty.

Then, the final stench from Huizenga’s tenure with the Marlins may finally float away.

Zuko protects an Earth Kingdom village from a pack of thugs. (Wikipedia)

M. Night Shyamalan, it is time you are stopped.

I’m not talking about the crimes against humanity that you committed with “Lady in the Water” or “The Happening.”

Instead I am referring to a travesty in the making that is near and dear to my heart.

That is the plan to turn one of my favorite cartoons, “Avatar: The Last Airbender,” into a live action movie.

Most of what Mr. Night has done in the past has been crap, but I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt because of how excited I was at the prospect of seeing Avatar in live action.

Now that excitement has been almost completely wiped out.

Casting has just recently been released for the key actors in what rumor put it would be a three-movie epic. Fitting since the cartoon series had a three-season run.

Now for those of you not familiar with the world of Avatar, here’s a brief rundown.

It all centers around the Avatar, a 12-year-old airbender called Aang. Okay, technically he’s 112, but he was frozen in ice for 100 of those years so we won’t count that.

Basically it’s Aang’s job to save the rest of the world from the Fire Nation, which has been at war with the other three nations for those 100 years.

The Air Nomads have already been extinguished leaving just the Earth Nation and what remains of the Water Nation.

Each of these nations has their own unique forms of bending and the Avatar is the lone person with the ability to master all four elements.

That is what makes him basically the ultimate badass in this world.

Anyways, moving on, the entire series has a strong Asian influence as all the nations study martial arts and seem to surround themselves in the Asian culture.

It was pretty much an assumption that the roles would not be filled with Asian actors since it’s an American movie, but this is just ridiculous.

The role of Aang is being played by an unknown kid from Texas. I’m willing to give him the benefit of the doubt since he at least is a karate expert so that should help.

I’ll also give a chance to the actors tabbed to play Sokka and Katara, Aang’s two companions along the path to saving the world.

But where I draw the line is the talk about having singer Jesse McCartney play the role of Zuko, the banished prince of the Fire Nation.

Now, for all I know, the young Mr. McCartney may in fact be an excellent actor, but he is no Zuko.

Zuko is arguably the biggest badass in the Avatar world behind Aang and his father, firelord Ozai. Uncle Iroh and Princess Azula have an argument as well, but that’s neither here nor there.

The point is, Zuko’s casting is crucial to the success of these movies, and if Jesse McCartney is the best we can do, you may as well cancel the project right here and now.

There’s no way a pretty boy singer can pull off that role, and to try to pass McCartney off as Zuko is just flat out insulting to fans of Avatar – preteen girls not included.

It would be like having Hugh Grant play Darth Vader or something like that. There just would not be the same level of fear there.

Now, word is this part is still being negotiated so hopefully something comes up and Mr. Night is not allowed to ruin this movie with this casting decision.

I would have no problems with the part being played by an unknown, like they’re doing with Aang, as long as it’s someone who can pull it off.

A miss on either of those two characters spells death to the movie’s chances.

And to Mr. Night, if you screw this up, you may as well choose a new career.

It’ll take a special level of sucktitude to not make this movie a success, but if your casting is any indication, you are well on your way to doing just that.

Dolphins QB Chad Pennington has numbers that rival his Jets replacement Brett Favre. (Getty Images)

… we take the ball from goal to goal like no one’s ever seen. We’re in the air, we’re on the ground, we’re always in control. And when you say Miami, you’re talking Super Bowl.”

Okay, so maybe no one’s mentioned Miami and Super Bowl in many a years.

Well, unless you’re talking about another team traveling to Miami for this coveted game.

In fact, the Dolphins have been about as far from the Super Bowl as you can be lately.

The worse of it was last season’s pathetic 1-15 campaign.

The lone game the Dolphins won was against the Baltimore Ravens – in overtime – and the Ravens were in the midst of a free fall for the ages.

They were so bad that head coach Cam Cameron was fired after just one season in charge. General Manager Randy Mueller was shown the door as well.

Then longtime Dolphins icons Zach Thomas and Jason Taylor were shipped outta town.

It didn’t look like things would be getting better anytime soon.

Even though the owners opened up the wallets to bring in Bill Parcells and all of his cronies, it was hard to keep the faith.

After all, the man pegged as the new head coach – Tony Sparano – would be in his first season as a head coach in the pros.

And there was the whole no quarterback thing.

Then Chad Pennington was brought in and I was less than thrilled.

He was better than when the Dolphins had had recently, but most of the talk about his was less than positive, especially the talk about his arm strength. From everything that was said, I was surprised that his throws got past the line of scrimmage.

But then the season started and something strange happened … they started winning games.

Before the year started, I told my roommate I’d be thrilled with a 6-win season.

It soon became clear that was aiming too low.

The Fins currently sit at 8-5 and are in a three-way tie atop the AFC East standings.

While they need a lot of help to do the improbable and return to the postseason, the fact they are even this close to accomplishing that speaks volumes to what the coaches, Pennington and the rest of the team have done this season.

And what they have done is bring hope to Dolphins fans.

It’s hard for me to remember the glory days.

The Fins have only been to the Super Bowl twice in my lifetime – once after the 1982 season and again after the 1984 campaign – and I was all of 3-years-old during the last game.

They haven’t been horrible since then, making the playoffs numerous times and even reaching the AFC Championship game once or twice.

But they’ve never been a dominant team.

Marino was always one of the league’s best, and who didn’t love the Mark brothers as well.

Still, that was not enough.

And lately things had been just sad.

Before this season, Miami had gone 20-42 the last four years, and it’s only that respectable cause of that fluke 9-7 season in 2005.

They’ve been through numerous coaches since booting out Don Shula, from Jimmy Johnson to Dave Wannstedt to Nick Saban to Cameron.

Alas. unless this proves to be another fluke year, it seems like Miami may finally have gotten back on the right track to being a consistent contender once again.

Next up for the Dolphins as they try to return to the playoffs is a game Sunday against the 49ers. Coincidently, the Niners were the Dolphins opponents the last time they made the Super Bowl. That day ended in a 38-16 loss for Miami.

Who better then to use to show that the Dolphins are indeed back.

Hopefully what they show is that the Fins that are back is the teams of the olden days, and not the ones of the 1-win days.

A wonderful thing happened this weekend.

No, the financial crisis wasn’t solved. That’ll take a lot more work.

No, gas prices didn’t drop back down under $3. That’s just silly.

No, I didn’t get laid. Now you’re just asking for the impossible.

No, what I’m talking about is the Chicago Cubs once again being eliminated from the playoffs.

What’s that you say?

I’m just a Cubs hater?

Well, I won’t deny that.

But let me tell you Mr. Hardcore Cubs fan, there’s a hell of a lot more of me than there is of you.

While you like to think that everyone loves your Cubbies and that they are the loveable losers to all of America, the fact is that most people could care less.

Let’s step back and take a look at those Cubbies you’re so fond off.

As we all know, they last won the World Series in 1908 when they topped the Detroit Tigers. Since then they have made it to the Series seven times (1910, 1918, 1929, 1932, 1935, 1938 and 1945). Needless to say, they came up empty.

The Cubs have found numerous things to blame this on.

First there’s the Billy Goat Curse from 1945.

Then there’s the black cat that ran out onto the field in 1969.

And who can forget Steve Bartman reaching for that foul ball in 2003.

Still, despite all these signs of curses, all hope wasn’t loss for the Cubs faithful.

And if ever there was a year to end the curse, it was this season.

There’s no way around it, the Cubs lineup was stacked. They had great starters, solid backups and a pretty damn good pitching staff. In the regular season they won 97 games, which tied them for second-most in the league behind the Angels’ 100 wins.

They won their division by 7.5 games and finished 11.5 games over the rival St. Louis Cardinals.

Nothing should have stood in the way of their march to the World Series. It shouldn’t have even been close.

Well, it wasn’t close, but not in the way the Cubs had hoped.

The NL West champion Dodgers made short work of Chicago, sweeping the series and outscoring the Cubs 20-6 in the process.

In a history full of disappointments, this one had to rank near the top.

Following the final game, the Chicago Tribune’s Web site posted several fan reactions to the latest debacle.

Here are just a couple of them:

“97 wins and I am embarassed to hell. No more of my money or time.”

“A team that plays small when on the biggest stage. Congrats Cubs, at the end of the season – you’re no better than the Pirates. Hope your proud.”

Those Pirates by the way finished the regular season 30.5 games behind Chicago.

These are just a small sample of the way Cubs fans felt about this latest letdown.

And some even gave up before the series was over.

As one friend put it, “I’ve seen this movie before, I know how it ends, I’m not wasting another two hours of my life watching it.”

But while Cubs fans mourned yet another devastating loss, the rest of the country celebrated.

For one thing, it is now officially 100 years of futility for the Boys in Blue. That’s a mark no one else will ever come close to matching, and the Cubs aren’t done yet.

You’re probably wondering why I have such animosity towards Chicago.

You might be asking what have they ever done to me?

The simple answer is unleashing Cubs fans into the world.

They are always quick to point out how you’re not a true fan like they are because they’ve stuck with their team through a century of ineptitude.

I say there’s a difference between loyalty and stupidity.

If everytime you walked into a McDonald’s, someone was there to throw a glass of water into your face, you wouldn’t keep going back would you?

Yet that’s exactly what Cubs fans do.

The team has repeatedly broken their fans hearts.

As one person said, “part of being a Cubs fan is having all your hopes and dreams shattered.”

You may call that type of loyalty inspiring.

I call it idiocy.

This is far from the only thing that Cubs fans do to annoy the greater public.

There is also constant talk about the curse. Talk to a Cubs fan, and the curse will surely be a topic of conversation.

Let us also not forget the singing of “Take me out to the ballgame.” While it may have been cute to hear a drunken Harry Carey sing it, hearing all the “celebrities” they trot out to sing it now is nothing short of criminal. 

And if you need proof that karma hates Cubs fans, look no further than the teams that have won World Series titles in recent years.

Hated rivals St. Louis and the Chicago White Sox have both hoisted the World Series trophy.

The Boston Red Sox, who were supposed to be nearly as cursed as the Cubs, have won multiple titles and are in the hunt for another one this year.

If that isn’t a case of karma spitting in the Cubs’ faces, I don’t know what is.

Another sign of karma is that the Cubs have not won a playoff game since going up 3-1 on the Florida Marlins in 2003.  Several Cubs fans were all but guaranteeing a World Series title at that point. Well, the NL did indeed win the title, but sadly for the Cubs it was the Marlins who took home the hardware.

Twice since then the Cubs have entered the playoffs with high hopes after winning the NL Central title. Both times they have been swept by inferior teams to raise their playoff losing streak to nine games.

But as usual, Cubs fans simply bounced back and are looking forward to next season.

Winning is irrelevant to them, as long as they get their booze and get to talk about how they’re better than any other fan base out there.

As far as for Cubs haters who are looking forward to seeing the drought reach 101 years, “just wait till next year.”

Anywho, that’s all for now. Just hang tight out there and I’ll have some goodness for you all to read soon enough.

Q: Why did you decide to start a blog?

A: Boredom? It was late at night, I was in a writing mood so I decided why the hell not. I had been meaning to do something to get into writing again since I haven’t done that in well over a year now. It’s hard to go from writing as much as I used to, to never writing at all. I figured this was as good a way as any to get back into it.

Q: What type of writing did you use to do?

A: I used to be a sports writer for newspapers. I started doing that in college and continued until about two years ago. After a nice vacation I got back into newspapers, but I am now on the production side of things so no more writing for me, not counting things like headlines and cutlines of course.

Q: Why did you choose this site to blog on?

A: I wasn’t really sure what the difference between the blogging sites was. I just wanted something that was easy to maintain. I know enough about computers to get by, but I definitely am no expert so it couldn’t be anyplace that was too complex. Ultimately I went with this one cause my friends Burke and Arla also have a blog on here. The address for theirs is drive2dine.wordpress.com if you want to check it out.

Q: What are you gonna be talking about in this blog?

A: Your guess is as good as mine. I’ll pretty much just be writing about whatever pops into my mind when I get in the mood to write. Or maybe I’ll see something that peaks my interest and I’ll decide to write about that. My blogs could end up being about anything from sports to weather to cartoons to what I did on a certain weekend. I barely know what I’m gonna be talking about for the rest of this Q&A, much less what I’ll be writing about in future blogs.

Q: Why would people care about these rants?

A: No one’s asking them to. This is just a way for me to get writing outta my system and entertain a few people along the way. I’m not trying to change anyone’s life with what I have to say. But if it gives them a few laughs or just a different way of looking at things, that’s good enough for me.

Q: Why did you go with Crazy Cuban for your site’s address?

A: Well, basically No. 1 I’m Cuban and B most of what I write will probably be crazy to most people. Since this is all for fun I’ll pretty much just be rambling about whatever pops into my head. And since this is just my little corner of the Word Wide Interweb, I don’t gotta worry about little things like whether or not what I have to say is fit to be published. That type of freedom will be pretty nice.

Q: Are you going to be on a steady writing schedule?

A: Probably not. It’s mostly gonna depend on when I get the urge to write something. About the only consistent thing will be that most of my writing will come late at night. That’s always when I’m most creative. Oh, and the whole working till midnight thing might play a factor in the late night writing as well.

Q: So any hints on what your next blog will be about?

A: You’ll just have to keep checking back to see for yourself. The beauty of my warped mind is that no one ever knows what could pop up in there. As you can tell from the few blogs I have on here, I tend to jump from one thing to something completely unrelated. So I guess that best answer I can give is that if you’re excpecting one thing from me, you’ll probably be getting the complete opposite.

Bengals quarterback Carson Palmer reaches to pull "Ocho Cinco" off the back of receiver Chad Johnson's jersey prior to the start of a game against the Falcons. (AP)

I’m sure by now you’ve heard the story of Chad Javon Ocho Cinco.

Ocho Cinco was born Chad Johnson. After playing college football at Oregon State he moved on to the NFL and quickly became a star with the Cincinnati Bengals.

Since then he has been known for making highlight plays and being a key part of one of the most explosive offenses in the leagues.

But even more than his prowess on the field is the crazy celebrations he has become famous for.

There was the time he busted out the Riverdance after scoring in a game against Chicago.

Another time he went to the sideline during a game against Baltimore and threw on a giant Hall of Fame replica jacket with “Future H.o.F 20??” written on the back.

And then there was his bad idea of jumping into the stands during a game at Cleveland. He was promptly showered with beer by the Browns’ fans for his troubles.

But the moment that led to the name change was not in fact a touchdown celebration. In fact, it didn’t even happen during a game.

During warm-ups for a game against the Falcons on Oct. 29, 2006, Johnson showed up on the field with the name “Ocho Cinco” pasted on the back of his jersey where Johnson was supposed to be.

Bengals quarterback Carson Palmer promptly ripped the “Ocho Cinco” off his back and the team’s got on with their business.

But still, a nickname was born.

Johnson said he was doing it in honor of Hispanic Heritage Month with the name Ocho Cinco being Spanish for eight-five. While Johnson’s jersey number is 85, ochenta y cinco (the correct translation) just doesn’t have the same ring to it.

And now, a few years later, Johnson finally found a way to beat the system.

His move got me to thinking, what if other athletes were to start changing their names to their numbers?

What if Tom Brady suddenly became Tom Uno Dos? And hey, he’s gonna have plenty of free time for the next year so it’s something he might think about, well, between impregnating actresses and super models of course.

Or how about Kobe Bryant? Kobe Dos Quatro does have kinda a nice ring to it.

Even worse, what if athletes start selling their naming rights?

How long is it before LeBron Nike suits up for the Cavs?

Or how about if A-Rod sells his name to Pepsi and we suddenly get A-Pop?

And then of course there’s LaDainian Vizio?  Actually, that one sounds kinda cool.

But I digress.

What’s that?

Ridiculous you say?

It’ll never happen?

The same coulda been said about the thought that Chad would change his name to Ocho Cinco just to spite the NFL.

Putting a patch on your jersey is one thing, but changing your last name to a number is what’s ridiculous.

And if you think he’ll be the last player to do something like this, then you’ll be sadly disappointed.

Although not as disappointed as those Patriots fans who get to spend the rest of the season watching Matt Cassel line up under center instead of Tom Uno Dos.

Of well, I’m sure the Pats will at least be able to make a good video out of it.

Henchman No. 24 prepares for action.

I’m here to mourn the passing of a great American hero.

Of course, I am talking about none other than Henchman No. 24 himself.

What’s this? You don’t know who No. 24 is? Well then shame on you.

No. 24 is one of the Monarch’s most trusted henchmen in the Adult Swim cartoon “The Venture Bros.”

No. 24 and his best friend, No. 21, are considered to be the Monarch’s top two men in his constant battle to kill his nemesis – Dr. Thaddeus S. Venture.

Time and time again, the Monarch chose to send No. 24 and No. 21 into battles with the sole mission of destroying Dr. Venture, along with his trusty bodyguard Brock Sampson and the two Venture brothers, Hank and Dean.

While they never succeeded in killing the good doctor or the bodyguard, No. 24 and No. 21 did manage to kill the brothers at the end of the first season. Unbeknownst to them, however, was that Dr. Venture kept a large supply of Hank and Dean clones handy for such a moment.

Enough of the background talk, we’re hear to talk about the greatness that was no. 24.

No. 24 was perhaps best known  for his unibrow and voice that sounded eerily similar to Ray Romano.

In addition to that, No. 24′s best attribute was his ability to escape unscarred from all the ludicrous mission that the Monarch sent he and No. 21 on.

As the Monarch so eloquently put it one day, No. 24 and his pal No. 21 combined a “rare blend of expendable and invulnerable.”

That is why, even though Brock has been able to kill more henchmen than anyone could count, he never could touch No. 24 and No. 21. Even after the duo killed the Venture boys (okay, so technically No. 21 killed them cause No. 24 was just driving the car), they still managed to escape any harm from Brock.

Granted, when the Monarch was sent to jail, No. 24 and No. 21 fell on hard times, even having to go to henchmen rehab, but they bounced back strong and led a new generation on henchmen for the Monarch.

In addition to their successes on the battle field, a highlight of the show is the back-and-forth banter between No. 24 and No. 21, whether they were arguing over No. 21′s purchase of a fake lightsaber or trying to decide who would win in a fight between Anne Frank and Lizzie Borden.

One of their greater debates revolved around the manner in which Smurfs reproduce.

To sum it up wouldn’t do it justice, so here’s the transcript:

Henchmen 24: Come on, they have one female servicing a large group of males! That implies a species that lays eggs!

Henchmen 21: Oh my god, you’re crazy! They’re so obviously mammals!

Henchmen 24: Please, she’d be in estrus 24/7 if she didn’t lay eggs.

Henchmen 21: Smurfs don’t lay eggs! I’ll tell you this again, Papa Smurf has a fucking beard! They’re mammals!

But alas, moments like this will be no more.

How No. 21 will bounce back from losing his best friend, no one knows. The Monarch may suffer from the loss even more as No. 24 was usually a key part of every mission he set for his henchmen.  

Sadly, the moment that sealed No. 24′s fate was the moment he put safety first and decided to buckle his seatbelt as he and No. 21 were dodging the battle by chillling out in the back of the Monarchmobile and eating nachos.

Dr. Venture’s robot H.E.L.P.eR. jumped into the driver’s seat and took off. While No. 21 was able to jump out, No. 24′s seat belt got stuck and he was doomed. H.E.L.P.eR. had a bomb stuck on him, and as soon as it went off, one of the world’s greatest heroes was gone.

Fittingly, the last sight of No. 24 happens to be a touching moment with No. 21 as he catches his severed head following the explosion.

Rest in peace No. 24.

You will be missed.